Vacation sex: it’s just better than regular sex. But why is vacation sex so good? For one, it forces you to break out of your routine and venture out of the ordinary. Here’s how to have vacation sex from the comfort of your own bed.
Why Vacation Sex Is So Memorable
The purpose of a vacation is to relax and unwind. You aren’t caught up in your to-do list or the typical hustle and bustle. Slowing down is something that nearly always amps up your arousal and intensifies your orgasm, and that’s a natural reflex during vacation. You are naturally more focused on your partner, enhancing your connection. You may even feel flirtier than usual. When you emotionally attune to your partner, you’ll feel a hint of that spark you had at the beginning of your relationship.
Another purpose of a vacation is to discover a new location. You’re not in the same bed, so the options start to open up. You don’t have to resort to the same old tired position; you can try something new. You may not have sex in the bed at all, when the beach or the shower is calling you. While exploring is at the forefront of your mind, why not explore your partner’s body as well?
Next, inhibitions are low. You may feel less of a sense of having left your stress behind. Your identity changes from mother to traveler, or from parent to explorer, so your sense of self temporarily changes alongside your priorities.
The combination of all these smaller transformations helps you break down barriers to pleasurable sex that you may experience at home. Planning in advance can enhance the experience as well and help align your expectations. You may want to bring a new toy, buy some lingerie that fits the locale, or do something more daring than normal.
For many, vacation is a much-needed reminder that a sense of play is part of what makes sex so enjoyable. If your sense of play is nowhere to be found, don’t miss my deep dive into how to restore it:
Simple Steps to Having Vacation Sex at Home
First things first: implement the vacation’s itinerary and pace. In other words, schedule a good amount of time for sex on the calendar so that you don’t encounter interruptions or deadlines in the middle.
Next, try something new in bed. Learning a new skill can give you that exploratory feeling. When you learn how to please your partner in a new way, your brain is engaged, and you are making a new memory. This helps keep you in the moment, in addition to increasing your arousal. It forces you to focus, and that’s the goal. If you haven’t tried yoni massage or temperature play yet, now is the time to venture outside the norm. Trying something new isn’t a critique of your routine—it’s a complement. When you know what you like and what your partner likes, the tendency is to optimize. But you can’t do that when you’re learning something new.
Create an inviting space for sex, and don’t overlook places outside of the bedroom. Having sex somewhere new isn’t reserved for vacations. You can have that feeling at home, too. Consider having sex in a steamy shower, or on the deck at night when no one can see. It can add an element of the taboo to your sex life as well as a welcome rush of adrenaline.
Bring a souvenir home. If there is a candle that smells like the beach, bring that home and light it before you have sex. Or maybe the sheets at your resort were so silky—try using those at home, but only on date nights, so that they stay special.
You can’t break out of your routine every time you have sex. But you can make it a point to have a sensual ritual that you incorporate regularly, where you switch positions, spend extra time, or try something different. Avoiding the trap of perpetually having maintenance sex is key to cultivating a lifetime of sexual pleasure and fulfillment.
Unpack Your (Mental) Baggage
When you’re ready for more science-backed practices, drop me a line. We can customize a path forward that’s unique to you and packed with pleasure.