You may already be aware that self-stimulation is healthy, fun, and good for you. It’s a way to connect with your body, learn about your turn-ons, and release stress. Self-touch can improve your sleep and mood and reduce your perception of pain. Some research has shown that people who masturbate are happier—even if they have a partner. Taking masturbation to the next level requires practice and patience, and it can be done by edging or delaying orgasm. Edging isn’t a frustrating process but a pleasurable one. Using the tips below, you can begin reaping the many benefits of edging.
Masturbation: It’s a Skill
Masturbation is a skill that you can continuously improve upon, and not only will your orgasms improve, but so will your understanding of your arousal. There are ways to teach your body to have more explosive orgasms than you may have ever felt before. One of the best ways to level up your self-pleasure routine is edging, sometimes referred to as peaking, orgasm control, or teasing. It’s free, and it’s quick to learn.
Why Edging Is So Popular
Edging turns masturbation into science, and the experimenting you do while edging will help you learn how to get the most out of self-touch and intimacy. Edging is basically the opposite of optimization. Rather than going as fast and proficiently as you can, you’re taking the scenic route in bed.
Edging can be healing, too. People raised as women may have seen pornography in which the women are climaxing after a few minutes of penis-in-vagina sex. This prevalent myth in porn can instill an internalized rush in some women, making them feel like they need to climax as quickly and conveniently as possible with their partner. Edging reminds you that it’s important to find pleasure in your body and that you’re worth the time it takes to get off.
How to Start Edging
Take inventory of your erogenous zones that may lie off the beaten path. You already know about your nipples, genitals, and perhaps your ears or neck. But what about your hands? They are packed with nerves—and so are your feet. Map out each place on your body that turns you on and which type of touch it prefers. This process is helpful in the case of injury or disease that causes numbness because you can train your brain to experience sexual pleasure for body parts that aren’t typically seen as erogenous. It’s also crucial for people who have gone through sexual trauma and may have some areas of their body that are off-limits.
To begin edging, start by taking your time during foreplay, even if you’re masturbating. Draw out the arousal process longer than usual, taking time to be present and notice new sensations. Once you get started touching yourself, don’t rush toward orgasm. If you start to get close, take a break. Return to the arousing touches, but don’t touch your genitals. When you feel calmer and in control again, you can resume masturbating. Delaying orgasm can make the finale even grander.
The Benefits of Edging
Edging gives your erogenous zones a break from the constant stimulation, drawing out your arousal phase and increasing the intensity of your orgasms. It can prevent numbness or rawness that sometimes comes along with intense masturbation. Delaying orgasm can also draw your attention toward sensations you may not have previously noticed you enjoy.
The more you practice, the more you can develop a laser focus on sensations that turn you on, increasing your overall arousal, making it a beneficial practice for people with low libido. This practice can help you feel deep arousal in places other than your genitals, resulting in a full-body experience. This helps increase the connection between your body and your genitals, making arousal easier to experience. It can also help you develop better orgasm control, lessening the anxiety for people who experience premature ejaculation.
For more on how to fix performance anxiety, watch my YouTube video:
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Bio: Dr. Nazanin Moali is a clinical psychologist and sex therapist in the Los Angeles area. She works with various individuals to understand and improve their sexuality. Dr. Moali conducts personal consultation sessions in her Torrance and Hermosa Beach offices, or via a secure, online video-counseling platform. Click here to take the sex quiz for women.