Pornography often features women who can ejaculate without much prompting. But much like regular cinema, porn is meant to entertain more than to educate. The science of female ejaculation is more interesting than the myths that surround it—and better yet, it’s empowering. If you’ve ever been curious about whether women can ejaculate (spoiler alert: they can) and what the fluid that comes out is (hint: it’s not urine), it’s time to get those questions answered.
Female Ejaculation Is Nothing New
Female ejaculation isn’t a new concept, though the conversation we’re having about it is. Records from ancient times indicate that people were aware of women’s ability to have an erotic ejaculation. Ancient Greek people knew about it and didn’t debate that it occurred, but they believed that female and male ejaculate combined to create new life. Ancient Indian and Chinese people referred to the liquid as the nectar of the gods. Female ejaculation has stood the test of time, yet its existence is still debated.
What Ejaculate Is Made Of
Scientists have studied the liquid that comes out when women ejaculate, and there’s widespread misinformation that it is urine. When women ejaculate, the fluid that comes out is from the female prostate, which they discovered by measuring an antigen in the fluid that only appears in prostatic tissue. The female prostate exists, though it’s often referred to as Skene’s glands, and it produces the liquid which is occasionally ejaculated.
The urge to ejaculate can feel eerily similar to the urge to urinate, furthering the rumor that female squirting fluid is urine. Worse yet, when women feel the urge to ejaculate, they may decide to hold it in for fear of urinating on their partner. Thanks to that feeling of anxiety, some women are standing in their own way of having a squirting orgasm.
Learning to Squirt
If you’re interested in learning to squirt, the first step is to find your G spot. The G spot is located not too far inside the vagina—if you slip your fingers a couple of inches in, you’ll feel its ridges. Just beyond that is the female prostate which responds to stimulation the same way the male prostate does. Stroking it gently and gradually increasing speed or pressure may be an excellent way to practice. Keep in mind that releasing the fluid and having an orgasm are two separate occurrences, so the essential part is to focus on your pleasure. Those who are worried about peeing during ejaculation can go to the bathroom beforehand for the mental reassurance that they won’t urinate. Doing something relaxing first to help your body and mind relax can make ejaculation more likely as well. Another pro tip is to put a towel down first to simplify cleanup.
Where Did It Come From, Where Did It Go?
The next question often is: if you can hold it in, where does it go next? Scientists have concluded that it travels back up the urethra and enters the bladder, which then exits as urine.
For more tips on how to help your partner squirt, check out my YouTube video below:
The Stigma Continues
Why is female ejaculation so clouded in mystery? The short answer is that everything to do with sexuality, especially for those born with vulvas, has been understudied, excluded from scientific discourse, and stigmatized. The fact that women have a working prostate in the form of Skene’s glands is, sadly, still being debated.
At the end of the day, female ejaculation is good for you, it’s normal, and it’s fun. If you can’t ejaculate but are otherwise sexually fulfilled, there’s no reason to feel like you must try to squirt. But if you want to learn a new way to climax, you and your partner have some experimenting to do.
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Bio: Dr. Nazanin Moali is a clinical psychologist and sex therapist in the Los Angeles area. She works with various individuals to understand and improve their sexuality. Dr. Moali conducts personal consultation sessions in her Torrance and Hermosa Beach offices, or via a secure, online video-counseling platform. Click here to take the sex quiz for women.