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Welcome to episode 339 of Sexology Podcast! Today I am delighted to welcome Stephanie Ganowski the podcast. In this episode, we discuss how to have conversations about boundaries and communicating sexual desires in a relationship.
Stephanie Ganowski is a Clinical Sexologist & Sex Coach for men, living in NYC. Her mission is to help men replace their sex pressures with sex pleasures.
Growing up, Steph was severely introverted and shy. She felt very challenged when it came to making friends and feeling confident in herself. She constantly questioned herself and her actions, while remaining hyper curious about those around her. Due to her low self-esteem, she allowed people into her life who “matched” the way she treated herself. Afterall, it felt “right” and comfortable. This included the men she attracted romantically.
Eventually, the prolonged mistreatment from men (and herself) was jolted by 5 incredibly caring, supportive, hilarious guys, she randomly befriended on Instagram, during a hard time. This was a huge wakeup call for Steph. It made her realize that not all men were “assholes” like she had thought. It was her mindset and lack of social skills that put her in the place she had been in.
“But what about these “asshole” guys from her past experiences? What’s going on with them? They must have pain too…” This curiosity led her to want to understand her relationship with men more closely and understand men in general. Step one for Steph, was to start working with men, 1:1, gain their trust, reach their vulnerable side and find a way to help them. Through understanding men and helping them heal and see progress in their lives, Steph would also learn to how to heal and bring people together. Her goal is to eventually get to the place where she can also help women who feel the same way about men, as she once did.
In this episode, you will hear:
- How communicating about sex and intimacy can lead to trust, passion, and desire.
- The best time to bring up a fetish or kink to a new partner
- How to prepare for communicating about vulnerable topics
- Why communication with a partner should focus on emotions and understanding
- Open-ended questions should provide a space for exploration without immediate implementation.
- How anal sex requires warming up with foreplay, lube, and a slow progression
- Why it’s important to take care of partners’ emotions and not take things personally
- How going to a dominatrix with a partner can be a helpful alternative to hands-on participation
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Foreplay Checklist
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Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey – http://petebailey.net/audio